We often hear that in marriage, it is not your job to change your spouse, that you are supposed to accept them for who they are. How true is this?
Let us look at God’s love, after all, our relationships are supposed to be patterned after that order. God loves us the way we are but does he desire that we stay the same way he found us. The answer is obviously no.
This is why he gave us his spirit and his commandments (instructions), so that we can become like him. (‘…be ye perfect even as your heavenly father is perfect.’). Paul also refers to this issue, albeit indirectly when he said ‘be transformed by the renewing of your mind’. That statement was not meant for singles alone.
While it is true that it is not your duty to change your spouse (or anybody), your spouse like everybody owes himself/herself the responsibility of becoming the person that God created him/her to be. This requires them to renew their minds constantly and change to fit into God’s unique agenda for them. The same also goes for you. The process of renewal includes but is not limited to thought processes, manner of speech, habits, and attitudes to spiritual things.
Being in a marital relationship should actually make correction (not nagging) easy if we have decided to renew our minds and become who God wants us to be. Two qualities are required to attain this balance:
I am a Medical Doctor, Brand Strategist and the Author of Musings of an Analytical Mind. I love to challenge conventional thinking and am a firm believer in the coexistence of aesthetics and quality. Follow me @ifeodedere on Twitter.